Fat People for Trump!

Alphas and Epsilons

BALTIMORE – One of the delights of being an American is that it is so easy to feel superior to your fellow countrymen. All you have to do is stand up straight and smile. Or if you really need an ego boost, just go to a local supermarket. Better yet, go to a supermarket with a Trump poster in the parking lot.

Trigger warning: In the following ramble, we make fun of democracy, Trump, obesity, cripples, baldness, and old people. There should be something here to offend just about everyone. But this is not to say you will find no redeeming social value here. We also explain why the masses are in revolt.

A recent visit to a supermarket left us feeling not just like a superior specimen of our sorry race, but wondering if the race itself might be doomed. Everyone we saw was decrepit… misshapen… or riding in an electric wheelchair.

Age works its sour magic on us all, but some income brackets fight it or hide it. Others don’t. James Nielsen, writing in the Buenos Aires Herald, elaborates:

“Caste divisions are becoming hereditary. What is more, there are striking physical differences between alphas, individuals who tend to be keen on exercise and care about their appearance, at the top, and the all too often obese epsilons down there at the bottom.”

Didn’t unlimited financing soften up the system, with grade creep in school, credit creep in the economy, title creep at work, fat creep at the waistline, mission creep in the bureaucracy – and creepy zombies and cronies allowed to flourish in every corner of the EZ money system?

Once the discipline of “hard” money was removed, didn’t our whole society turn to mush?

A Harvard economist, Benjamin Friedman, wrote a book titled The Moral Consequence of Economic Growth. He claims people are nicer when they are happy with their material progress.

When things are getting better, he says, they begin to look out not only for themselves but for others, too. We have a suspicion that the professor was hoodwinked by his lab rats. He asked questions; they gave the answers they thought he wanted.

But we are connecting the dots. And one of his dots is an important link: We feel good or bad – not absolutely, but relatively. We don’t need to actually earn more money to feel good; we just need to earn more than our brother-in-law.

Brexit to “Texit”

The man who is just a little bit fat feels better about himself when he sees someone who is so obese he can barely walk. Both feel better when they are shrinking instead of porking up. When an economy is expanding, people tend to feel content too. Compared to the way things used to be, they are better off.

But when an economy stops making progress, people look to their friends, neighbors and Mexican immigrants for their sense of well-being. If the comparison is flattering, they feel superior. If not, they vote for Trump.

Alert readers will see the mathematical implication.

When an economy is growing and prosperous, almost everyone can feel better off and the Establishment can sleep soundly. When it is stagnant, only half the population can feel better off. And when financial progress is concentrated in a handful of people, the elite bar their doors.

“People in Texas just feel separate from the rest of the U.S.,” says our researcher Chad, who comes from the Lone Star State. “There is already a ‘Texit’ movement. I think some people are serious about it.”

If not now, they will be later. Fewer and fewer people are doing better financially. Typically, they are the alphas: the smart people, the thin people, the people in and around centers of Deep State power.

An anti-hunger organization, the Food Research & Action Center, reports:

“Wages were inversely related to the BMI [body mass index] and obesity in a nationally representative sample of more than 6,000 adults – meaning, those with low wages had increased BMI as well as increased chance of being obese.” 

And nearly 40% of adults are now obese.

Over the Top

As we reported last week, even without a single real representative in Congress, and not a single manufacturer still in the city, the District of Columbia has grown rich. Reports Breitbart.com:

“According to new Census figures released on Thursday, the Washington, D.C. area has the highest median household income at around $90,000. The San Francisco region is next at around $80,000. The Boston area is third at around $72,000. 

As the Washington Post noted, Washington, D.C. “also has a staggering average per capita income of $74,733 for each of its 632,323 residents, which is 79% higher than the national average of $43,725.”

The fat man in fly-over country can no longer compare himself favorably to years past; he hasn’t had a real pay raise in 40 years. He’s lost, on average, half his hair and he’s gained, on average, about 25 pounds.

There’s more than money at stake. During the Jimmy Carter years, he could support his family. Now, he’s broken down and can barely support himself. So, he casts a sullen and surly eye toward the Potomac… and wants to LEAVE.

The Iowa Political Predictions market puts the odds of a Trump win at about 30%. Gamble a dollar. If he wins, you’ll get back three bucks. But Ronald Regan’s economic advisor Art Laffer says Trump will win in a landslide, taking 48 out of 50 states.

No one has, as far as we know, correlated obesity to voting patterns. But we’ll take a guess: In the upcoming election, Donald Trump will take the Fat Vote. That alone may be enough to put him over the top.